Women’s stories – Roberta

Here we are at our Sunday story, today I will tell you the story of Roberta who shortly after the wedding realized that her husband was anything but a prince charming. She too, like many other women, showed her courage by making a very difficult but necessary decision to get out of the tunnel of violence.

“Go and let the stories, or life, happen to you, and work for these stories of your life, pour your blood and your tears and your laughter on them until they bloom, until you bloom.”

Women that run with the wolves – Clarissa Pinkola Estés

Buona lettura. 🙂

racconto preso dal sito: http://blog.pianetadonna.it/lestoriediagatha/roberta/

ROBERTA


I have always been a curious, intelligent person, but perhaps a bit naive. Growing up in a simple and unpretentious family, with little social ambitions, I always thought I was worth little. This was one of the causes of the painful events that unfolded over the course of my life.

During my adolescence and university years, I had few, but long and passionate stories. I grew up with a depressed mother who was unable to teach me anything emotionally. I therefore lacked that “sentimental education”, which should already be taught at school.

I proceeded as self-taught in my love stories whose common denominator was certainly the lack of self-esteem. I thought I was worth little. But I only realized this after hard work on myself, after the separation.

Good girls do not go to heaven, as they teach you in catechism, but they often end up in the jaws of some wolf, just like I did. I was “great”, however, as some of my friends say, and I defeated the wolf by digging in the resources I found within me. I was saved thanks to hard work I did on myself and the people I met after the separation, who helped me understand that anything is possible. Just want it. Within a year I was able to remove a violent and selfish father/husband from home and to rebuild a life made of passions that I cultivate every day and that have helped me to understand who I am and what I want.

The first thing I did was to resume the passion for photography, music and theater that I had abandoned. On my difficult path I met an association of single parents, One Parent, even though, when I entered in it, much of the work had been done and I was no longer the princess who believed in fairy tales. I was helped a lot by an anti-violence center and by a good lawyer who supported me in the divorce and who believed in me, making me recover my esteem in myself.

The separation involved the purchase of half of our house with the related mortgage, but I put all my energy. I worked hard and now, economically speaking, I am better off than when I was married. A great satisfaction! Creating my own consulting firm and working in public relations, helped me to open up to others and understand that I was worth something. I met the fake prince in a period of great enthusiasm and I believed his promises which immediately turned out to be just lies. Two children were born, but it was never a happy marriage, based on complicity and respect. He lied to me all the time. After yet another lie I turned to a free legal service for women and from there my new life began.

“If you go to the lawyer, I’ll kill you” I heard myself say in response to a request for separation, but I didn’t give up and went first to the police and then to the lawyer. And so I surprised him: he didn’t expect a similar reaction and I think he still doesn’t realize how strong and combative I could be. I won. And if I did it, other women can do it too, all those who find themselves with a fake prince charming, indeed with a wolf dressed in blue, in the false guise of the man of your dreams.

Yes, because the fake princes in the eyes of friends are the best men that could happen to you, the ones who when you go to a party everyone looks because they are always well-groomed and well dressed and confident.

It was not easy, but I did it and I changed my life: now I am a fulfilled and serene person. When I look my children in the eyes, I see so much of myself and my dreams and I think I did well to get rid of that burden that was harming them too. After 6 years I have finally divorced, I have created a circle of affection and friendships around me and my children.

For nothing in the world I would go back, indeed I only regret not having done it before, when I realized what kind of man he was. Life and its most delicious fruits are all in front of me. In front of us.

Just believe.

If you want to tell your story and share it, you can contact me by email or in response to this post.

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